Comments on: Is “You’re Perfect As You Are” Just a Load of Hogwash?

By: Michelle Russell

Michelle Russell — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 18:32:58 +0000

Christine–I LOVE that quote! I think I need to paint it on a plaque and hang it on my wall.

By: Christine

Christine — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 17:35:24 +0000

Thanks for this post. I have been trying to untangle the whole self-acceptance vs. self-improvement thing and this has been very helpful.

If I can add something to the ‘perfection’ quotes above, mine is ‘Done beats perfect. Every time.’

By: Michelle Russell

Michelle Russell — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 00:23:14 +0000

@EmilyRoots – Hear, here! And yes, books have always been my favorite great escape, too.

@Deb Owen – Congrats on allowing yourself to take a break, and happy writing! Though it sounds like I don’t even need to wish you that. )

By: Deb Owen

Deb Owen — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 21:14:44 +0000

I loved that post of Jen’s, and this one.

People do worry what would happen if they were to actually accept themselves. If anything, what happens is a lightness and an energy that infuses all that we do, including our rest. It all takes on a new depth and a new meaning and we may find ourselves happy.

Now, for the rest thing, I kept getting clues that I needed to take a ‘blog break’. It took a good couple of days before my brain finally stopped freaking out about it. Now, I’m back and the writing won’t stop and it’s awesome!

Rest is wonderful. And you’re body and energy will tell you when it’s had enough.

Thanks for the great post!

By: Michelle Russell

Michelle Russell — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 17:56:57 +0000

@Bridget – You are so right–we’re socialized to identify ourselves with our careers. And I *LOVE* your answer to that common question!

@Paulita – I need more rest than I wish I did, too. I’m still practicing at allowing myself to take it when I need it, but that doesn’t mean I *like* it. The overachiever tendencies are definitely still there. ;o)

@HD – That’s a great mantra! I sometimes use “The perfect is the enemy of the good”–that one helps me a lot to remember that “good enough” really is good enough.

@Doris – Interesting about diamonds! I didn’t know that was the way to spot real vs. fake ones. And yes, nature is a wonderful teacher. For instance, the prettiest stones I’ve ever picked up on beaches have been the ones with interesting flaw lines running through them.

By: EmilyRoots

EmilyRoots — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 17:55:24 +0000

This was really helpful for me today. And yes, usually I find myself re-reading either the Harry Potter series, Jane Eyre or anything by Jane Austen when I have overdone the perfectionism. To escape into someone else’s (hopefully very romanticized) life is a wonderful break.
Here’s to letting ourselves not be perfect!

By: Doris Jeanette, Psy.D.

Doris Jeanette, Psy.D. — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 17:39:52 +0000

You know you are real when you are not perfect. Like the things in nature. Everything has a flaw, that is how you know a diamond is real and not fake. Same is true for us. We are real human beings and we are lovable–no matter what. Real love is not a diet of sugar. No way! I get sick of sugar, fast. A person who is always nice and smiling is the same as too much sugar. It is easy to love yourself when you are nice, the hard part is when you are not nice.

By: Kate

Kate — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 17:31:10 +0000

Just awesome.

By: Leah

Leah — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 14:45:20 +0000

great post! so true that it’s so easy to say, i’m ok with myself as I am and another thing completely to believe it and put it into practice.

By: HD Silversmith

HD Silversmith — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 14:38:22 +0000

Great post.

Self-talk? CRITICAL!!!!

One of my favorite mantras to gabble to myself when I’m locked in the death-trap of perfectionism is “Good is good enough” (sometimes it’s even “Adequate is good enough”).

And as you point out, that doesn’t make a recovering perfectionist suddenly become a slacker. If anything, ultimately, it can make one a less driven, happier, and therefore more productive person.

Thanks!
HD